musings on forgiveness

this is from my “miscellaneous thoughts” note on my notes app from about a month ago:

It’s 1am and I’m thinking about forgiveness. My mind is too active to let me fall asleep. I’m thinking about how forgiveness is a choice, an action, and not a feeling. I’m thinking about how we are called to reconciliation with one another and more importantly, with God. I’m thinking about how showing Godly love means to choose forgiveness, to let go of contempt, to pray against the feelings of wanting to get revenge or prolonged anger. To forgive is to be free. None of us are deserving of forgiveness, from God, or frankly, from each other. But what does “deserve” really mean? I think we use that term too liberally. All we have is given based on kindness and forgiveness. Because He is good, not because we are. What I deserve is not what I find. That is love. Choosing to give out of His goodness. Choosing to listen and forgive out of His selflessness. I want to forgive, God help me to. You can forgive, you can bear that weight.

“To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you” CS Lewis